"Have you ever felt like there was something you desperately wanted to talk about but couldn’t find the right words, person to share it with or that the subject was possibly considered taboo? A moment where silence felt safer than speaking, even though your heart knew the conversation was long overdue?"
For many women, menopause feels exactly like that.. a conversation long overdue —because its an intensely personal, yet profoundly shared experience that we’ve been told to suffer through in silence.
It’s a strange cultural blind spot.
Menopause, a natural rite of passage, is often reduced to the butt of jokes—"my crazy wife," "hot flashes and mood swings"—and even women, ourselves, tend to share only the horror stories. The whispers, the shame, the secrecy—it all builds a wall of misunderstanding between us and the people who could be supporting us.
But I have found that there’s a better way.
Opening constructive conversations about menopause—clear, compassionate, and inclusive ones—is the key to breaking down this wall. And here’s the best part: it doesn’t just help women; it uplifts everyone connected to us. I’ll say it again: I have found that conversations, not silence, heal. I have found that the stories we share can light the way for others.
Research tells us that over 1 billion women worldwide will be postmenopausal by 2025.
Let that sink in.
Yet despite the enormity of this life stage, only a fraction of us feel equipped or supported to navigate it. A study found that 73% of women don’t seek help for menopausal symptoms, often out of embarrassment or fear of being dismissed. What’s more, men are often left confused or sidelined, unsure of their role in this transformation.
Jane Hardwicke Collings, a woman I deeply respect a true wayshower & authority in this space, emphasises the importance of "reimagining menopause" as a rite of passage rather than a burden.
She describes it as a transition from the "summer" of our lives to "autumn," where women can claim their wisdom, embody their power, and lead their communities. Jane challenges societal fears and misconceptions, calling menopause an "energetic upgrade" that can deepen a woman’s connection to herself and her purpose. She advocates for breaking cultural taboos and embracing this phase as transformative and empowering.
So what if we flipped the script WHAT IF WE UNLOCKED the conversation?
What if menopause became a dinner table topic instead of a punchline or something to be dreaded? Imagine daughters prepared for their future, friends offering meaningful support, and partners becoming allies rather than spectators. It starts with simple, disruptive action: TALKING .. Because when we talk, we connect. And when we connect, we transform.
I remember a time when I was in my early thirties, out shopping with my mum when she was visiting from Tassie. She was rifling through a rack of clothes, her face flushed, beads of sweat forming on her brow. I looked at her and said, "You’re having a hot flush now, aren’t you?" She shot me a look—equal parts agitation and resignation—and replied, "Just wait till it’s your turn."
In that moment, it felt like both a challenge and a threat. But no more information came. That was it. End of conversation.
Years later, when my own transition began, that fire inside—the infamous “hot flush”—came for me, too. And I thought back to that day with my mum. I felt sad. Sad that she hadn’t shared her story, her wisdom, or her fears. Sad that I wasn’t prepared for this profound rite of passage. Sad that women’s mysteries, like menopause, menstruation and childbirth, remain secret, hidden, medicalised and shrouded in shame & fear.
Even worse, I began to notice how menopause is treated in the world around us. Jokes about "hormonal wives," dismissive glances, eye rolling, the lack of sisterly support. The fire I felt wasn’t just in my body; it burned in my heart. I knew then that we had to do better—for our daughters, for our sisters, and even for our men. Because this isn’t just a women’s issue. This is a HUMAN ISSUE. It's a rite of passage to be revered not minimised.
So, where do we go from here? Well this is just the very beginning of the conversation but here are some actionable ways to open the dialouge and change the narrative:
For Women of All Ages: Share your stories. Be brave. Whether you’re 25 or 75, talk about your experiences or ask the women in your life about theirs. Stories are how we learn, connect, and heal.
For Men: Be curious, not dismissive. Instead of joking or minimising ask questions. "What can I do to support you?" can mean the world to the women you care about.
For Families and Communities: Make menopause a shared topic, not a solo struggle. Organise workshops, women's circles, book clubs, or even family chats. Normalise it. Treat it as the natural, transformative stage that it is.
When we open the conversation, we create a world where menopause isn’t a storm to weather alone but a journey we walk together. And that, my friends, is the kind of world I want for my daughter, her daughter, and all of us.
Let’s start talking. The fire is already within us—now let’s use it to light the way.
Wyld Blessings
Trace xXx
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